Head on or Swerve?

Cars haven't been on my team lately. Last weekend - Sky and I got in an accident resulting in a very sad windshield and bumper but we were both fine. Thursday - I was going to meet my mom in Draper so she could take my car in to get fixed. Ironically, I got in a car accident right before I was supposed to exit the freeway. The truck in front of me dropped a huge wooden shelf in my lane. I had 3 seconds to decide if I was going to swerve or hit the thing dead on. I tried to swerve but wasn't fast enough. I barely hit the shelf which sent me spinning into the right median. Bouncing off the median sent me spinning again. This time I went right into the middle of the freeway/on coming traffic. I literally said to myself "Okay, this is where it ends". I've never been so scared in my whole life. Meanwhile, I listened to lots of brakes screeching to a stop and horns going crazy. I wasn't getting hit though. Somehow all the cars stopped before they hit me. I was unharmed besides a little whiplash and a sore ankle. How?!?!?! My car was completely gone. Stella died but I barely got even a bruise.

My three phone calls: 911, my mom, Skyler. With each phone call I got a little more unglued. Before I knew it I was done talking to the cops, safe in my mom car, and watching my friends drive past ready pick me up and take my back to Provo.


Yesterday Sky and I tried to go to my sister's baby gender reveal. We made it to Lehi before a tire blew out. I'm officially cursed and tying myself down to Provo before anyone else gets hurt!


These three events have made me think. Am I willing to hit things head on or do I swerve every time? Which one is better? Would I have been safer if I hadn't swerved? Right before the car crash on Thursday I was presented with the new meal plan. Suddenly, I was throwing my hands up and ready to run away. As soon as I read the meal plan, nothing else mattered. I was mad. I wasn't Carly anymore. The progress I had made didn't exist. The new meal plan meant all my friends were going to bail on me and I couldn't trust anyone. Somehow a new meal plan meant bridges needed to be burned with everyone and everything. Ed was letting me know that I was a burden to everyone, my boyfriend was ready to dump me, my parents were disappointed in me, I wasn't doing nearly as well in school or life as I had thought. That one email sent me into a mad fight with Ed. It was scary, I decided to try to swerve. I got in my car and ran. I wanted to shut everyone else out. Nobody else mattered. If I drove away nobody was going to make me eat pizza that night. Nobody could touch me if I was going 75 miles an hour down the freeway. Not my smartest move. At that moment it seemed like the only option though.

I was quickly forced to learn that I can run but I can't hide. I can swerve but something else will block my way before I have time to react. There are always going to be obstacles. If I hit them head on, I get to be the one with a little more control of where I end up.


I thought this sticker was super ironic. It says, "Fearless Patient". Little did everyone know fear is what put me in the neck brace and hospital gown.

The staff at the hospital really loved us. While Sky and Jason waited patiently in the waiting room we had our own party with all the staff. I think everyone thought we were all on morphine. Nope just giggly for no reason. It was a crazy night. We were at the hospital for 3 hours. We managed to make at least a dozen friends. Then we went back to Jason and Meghan's house to do homework at eat dinner. Meghan made me a salad while everyone else ate pizza. BLESSED. One swerve that didn't come back to bite me.

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