It's Complicated

Our love story isn't simple to say the least. It's been 18 months since I very first started getting to know Skyler Farmer. Our first date was sweet and simple. We made sushi, talked for a long while, went for a walk around provo, and watched a show that we had been discussing at work. The next month was just as simple. I was going on dates with multiple guys but for sure favored Skyler. We talked throughout the day everyday. He joked that he claimed date nights with me on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday so that the other dates I was going on didn't get in the way.

I loved his friend group instantly. They were super welcoming and tried really hard to get to know me. Skyler went through some personal conflicts and pushed me away at one point. I was hurt and confused but became really close with some of his closest friends. Within a month we were back to spending as much time as possible together. By the end of Christmas break we decided we wanted to be exclusive. This was pure bliss! We went ice skating, took a day trip to Park City, had endless late night chats, he helped me eat almonds or yogurt even if it meant making me cry. He pushed my eating disorder when I wasn't strong enough to do it myself.

Once again, a few personal conflicts pushed us away from each other. I was heart broken and in a million pieces. That lasted for another two months until summer came around and we decided to try dating again. This was the hardest round yet. I was gone for most of June. By the time I got back, there was another break up waiting to happen.

Three times. You'd think that mean it was over forever! Nope! In November, I started dating someone from work. He was nice, treated me well, and turned out to be completely boring and closed minded. At that point, I thought I had given up on Skyler. He had personal things to handle that were deal breakers for me. I couldn't be part of his life or wait around while those problems were still present. I told myself that I had moved on and was convinced he wasn't coming back.

This is when MY Sky finally showed up. The Sky I used to see glimpses of every once in a while. The Sky that knows how to treat me like gold and brings me coffee ice cream when I'm stressed. The Sky that listens when I need to talk and is so good at talking me through things. This Skyler can fix anything including my broken heart. He is my favorite adventure buddy and best friend. Skyler was finally whole again. He turned his life around. All the deal breakers seemed to be worked out. I broke up with the guy I had just started dating and started spending more and more time with Skyler. I was very catious at first but soon everything felt right. I had my freak outs every once in a while but soon realized that I don't need to be afraid of Skyler breaking my heart again. He's not just back. He's better. This guy knows my soul and my heart. I am 100% the Carly that I want to be when I'm with Sky.

I sometimes wish our love story was simple. I find myself wishing that I could have just loved him from day one. I wish we didn't have to go through those hard times of forcing me to eat almonds or pushing each other away. I wish the break ups didn't have to happen. I wish my family could love him and trust him like I do. That is not our story. Our story is messy and confusing. Our story is practically a sop opera. Our story led us to know and understand each other so much more than a simple story would have. For that, I am grateful. Our story has proven itself in the deepest and darkest of storms. Our story created a love that can last forever. I sure do love being the other half of Skarly.