Looking the Part
I did it. I went to group therapy. It only took a year to convince me but I got there. It was terrifying. I hated feeling so exposed but then I realized everyone in the room hated feeling exposed. The biggest thing that hour and a half taught me was you don't have to look sick to be sick.
Everyone has this misconception that in order to have that bad of an eating disorder you have to look like a holocaust victim. I had convinced myself that I couldn't be THAT sick because people couldn't even tell something was wrong with me. Group taught me that there are at least 6 other girls who have felt exactly like me. They go to school and work with this on their shoulders and barely anyone around them knowing or understanding the little green monster in their head. They go through similar struggles every day.
It is empowering to know that I can be vulnerable in a room once a week for an hour and half with girls that have at some point, had my same thoughts. I am not alone.
Everyone has this misconception that in order to have that bad of an eating disorder you have to look like a holocaust victim. I had convinced myself that I couldn't be THAT sick because people couldn't even tell something was wrong with me. Group taught me that there are at least 6 other girls who have felt exactly like me. They go to school and work with this on their shoulders and barely anyone around them knowing or understanding the little green monster in their head. They go through similar struggles every day.
It is empowering to know that I can be vulnerable in a room once a week for an hour and half with girls that have at some point, had my same thoughts. I am not alone.
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